As a way to thank all our loyal and wonderful readers, myself and a few of my author besties have come together to give one lucky reader the chance to win a $150 Amazon Giftcard this Christmas. To enter, follow the instructions below. For bonus entry points be sure to check out the extra links you can follow to give you more chances to win!
Cover Reveal hosted by Give Me Books
Release Date 23rd September
Designers - GraphicsCovered (me and my mumma)
Photographer - Locrifa
Sunny beach and hot cabana boy…tick
One pissed off father who just happens to be the God of Love…ahhh, dang it.
Phoibe Cupid (aka Bee aka Hedone) is in the business of love, and she hates it. Stuck in a dead end job with no reprieve in sight, she and her trusty BFF, Mac (aka Macaria aka Mac the bangalicious), travel the mortal realm leaving a trail of chaos and lusty humans in their wake. Life’s good, right up until that moment her daddy grounds her ass and shoots her with her own damn arrow. Now she’s nothing but a frisky horn-dog who has it bad for her potential soul mate and to make matters worse, he doesn’t feel the same way.
The best way to learn about love is to fall into it, kicking and screaming. <3
SPECIAL Pre-order price 50% off normal retail price
Copyright Kirsty Dallas 2017
“You want to make this game a little more interesting?”
“What did you have in mind?” I asked using every ounce of seduction in my voice I could possibly manage without sounding like a sex phone operator. A little side bet in a game of pool could certainly help me climb Mount Austin.
“What do you want if you win?”
“A kiss, and not puckered up cheek kiss, I’m talking about a real kiss, on the lips, and it must go longer than ten seconds, and there must be tongue involved.” My answer was spewed with far too much enthusiasm and zero hesitation. Pathetic!
Austin laughed loudly and I really liked that I could make him laugh but I was also worried that he wasn't taking me seriously. I wanted that kiss and I would battle like a demon trapped in Hades Underworld with nothing more than a stick and a ball for that damn kiss!
“Fair enough, if I win, I get to take you to a movie.”
Huffing out an exasperated breath of air I looked around the room in astonishment. “You don’t want to use this opportunity to take advantage of me too?” I was entirely outraged at his lack of desire to take advantage of me. Didn’t he want to feel me up just a little bit?
“A romance movie,” Austin continued, not at all fazed by my little tantrum.
“That’s not the kind of advantage I had in mind,” I hissed.
“Take it or leave it, Sugar.”
Oh my lady parts, I practically quivered. He had indulged me with a pet name and I was struck speechless. It was the first time anyone had ever offered me an affectionate name, as sickeningly cute as it was.
“I’ll take it, I’m going to kick your backside anyway, so it makes no difference.”
Austin pulled a coin from his pocket and tossed it into the air. It landed in his palm and without looking, he flipped it over to lay on the top of his hand. “Heads or tails?”
This right here felt like a defining moment in my life. How many momentous moments had hinged on such an insignificant toss of a coin? With my bow I would have the power to manipulate this situation to benefit me, without it I was laid at the mercy of the fates, and I was so not a fan. The Moirai, or otherwise known in the English language as the fates, were three fickle bitches who liked to play in a not so fun way.
“Heads, I’ve always enjoyed a little head,” I whispered, watching Austin’s hand as if I still might manage to control the outcome of the coin toss.
The heat in Austin’s gaze flared for just a moment before vanishing into thin air and he pulled his hand away revealing an effing tail. I was competitive, I hated to lose, even a freaking coin toss. When I would have stomped my foot and sulked a little, Austin stepped into my personal space and ran a calloused finger down my pert nose.
“I’ll break, be prepared to have your cold heart blown to smithereens, Sugar. Pretty Woman is screening in the park this Sunday afternoon, you’re going to love it.”
Recently you BLOCKED one of my books from being sold on your site as you believe it is in breach of copyright. If I am to understand correctly, my book is “widely available on the web”, therefore you doubt my authenticity as its original creator. I have a few important things to say in regards to this matter.
Number one, yes, ALL my books are widely available on the web, only legally available through AMAZON, IBOOKS, KOBO, AND BARNES&NOBLE, though. Ninety –nine point nine percent of other sites that distribute my books do so illegally, thanks to the intrepid and unforgiving nature of some readers who choose to ‘steal’ my work. Tirelessly I have fought the beast of piracy, outlaying sometimes great expense and an unfathomable amount of time sitting and drafting DMCA notices and hunting down the email addresses to forward them to, and I have been doing so since forty-eight hours after my very first book was published in 2013 - (Pirates, I have much to say to you, though I can sum it up with one perfectly poised middle finger). So, now while I fight to remove my files from HUNDREDS of file sharing sites, you block sales of my box set because it’s “widely available on the web”. Why, thank you, thank you so very freaking much for looking out for me.
Number two, when I have reached out to you to explain I am the publisher and original creator of the work, you’ve answered my email, TWICE NOW, with the same automated response (which I imagine would be delivered in an uptight nasal tone that would really get my panties in a bunch). Sit tight while I go copy and paste this awesome piece of advice you have so generously offered.
Thank you for your inquiry regarding the following book(s):
Mercy's Angels Box Set - 6416521
Please provide any documentation or other evidence that proves you have retained rights for the book(s) listed above. Acceptable documentation includes a legal agreement from the author or publisher verifying you retain exclusive publishing rights.
To learn more, please see:
Please reply within 4 days to firstname.lastname@example.org with documentation, including the title and ID numbers of the books. If documentation is not received within 5 days, your book will not be made available for sale.
Oh thou art Pierre, you do have such an exotic and sexy name, but, I just want to flick you in the eye for this email…hard!
Number three…Have you even looked at my KDP account? Because, if you had you would notice that I have nine other books currently available through your site. Nine other books with my name to them, published to your site, four of which are from the very series you have so kindly BLOCKED, all for sale, with reviews, sales records, reports etc, from the minute I published them. If you were to take a cursory glance at my account anyone with a lick of common sense would realize I AM THE CREATOR OF THIS BOOK!
Lastly, for the second time you have requested permission from the publisher for me to publish this book. I don’t know if this is exactly legal, but, I’ll give it my best shot.
I, Kirsty Dallas, hereby give Kirsty Dallas permission to publish her books. She’s a cool, small time, independently published author who would never rip off her own work, or anybody’s for that matter. She would be happy to share her Kindle and iTunes purchases with you to prove she is a FANATIC buyer of media like books, music and movies. You could say it’s her weakness, she even had to quit her crack cocaine habit to support her unhealthy addiction of buying books and supporting the authors she loves. She can provide you with the original manuscript filled with such deplorable mistakes it would make you beat your head against a wall and wonder how on earth did this chick become an author. She can also provide you with the name of her editor in the States whose husband is a Texas Law Man and would gladly explain to you how unnervingly annoying she has been in questioning them both for the last three years about US law, weapons and dumb-ass shit that any Joe in the US would probably know. She has also given permission for you to ring her mumma, who birthed her and painfully read every lame word she ever wrote, as a personal referee to the authenticity you are questioning.
We dutifully request that you re-publish the Mercy’s Angels Box Set, with all the existing reviews.
p.s I’m just joking about the cocaine
p.p.s Did swearing in this legal document make it void?